Last month a friend posted an amazing reflection about the plight of women who are just too much of everything to others. Her name is Brianna, and her post can be found at her site Unveiled and Revealed here. Sometimes, we are too much for those in our lives. We are too outspoken, too liberal or too conservative. We are too compassionate, too passionate and too brave. All too often, while some of you think we are confident and secure, we are feeling like we aren’t even close to being enough for anyone.

There are many reasons for a woman to think she isn’t enough. Some of these things stem from the way a woman feels about herself personally.  From her hair cut to her body image, physical attributes alone can be overwhelming contributing factors to this problem. Combine these with rejection and fear at work or in other areas, and you have a  full-blown unworthy feeling mess standing before you.

These feelings of not measuring up start within, and are normally not anything others will notice. It’s when she hears that little annoying voice. The one which overrides everything good that speaks to her in the most critical moment. The voices of self-doubt, fear and security creep in, leaving little room for other more positive thoughts.

Then come the unpredictable cracks, slowly they grow and branch off.

• Her child gets in a fight at school- crack
• She misses a deadline at work- crack
• Her husband mentions a flaw- crack
• Her mom criticizes her choices- crack
• Her friend cancels a much-needed coffee date- crack
• A mentor responds to her self-editing choices- crack

As soon as these cracks branch off, her self-worth and confidence take a nose dive. The spiral can be so fast, most don’t see it coming until – BAM. She has broken wide open the size of the Grand Canyon and feels just awful. The tears rush like a waterfall, the sobs like earthquakes. She falls to her knees and she says “I quit”.

What in the world could possibly reduce a woman who is normally “too much” for most people to be reduced to a sobbing mess, unable to focus for even a minute? What could be the reason she is feeling so unworthy, unloved and broken? Why has this seemingly strong as steel lady fallen into a pit of emotional despair?

This woman before you transformed into a puddle of loneliness because many things have piled up on her. Her son got in a fight at school after he was rude to her that morning- she disciplined him harshly then dropped him at school. She missed her deadline at work because she was counseling a coworker due to an evolving domestic situation. She prayed with her instead of polishing her project and crunching numbers. Her husband’s off-hand remarks about her flaw hit her hard, making her self-conscious and taken by surprise. Her mother’s harsh criticism of her choices comes at a time when she misses her grandmother and could use a woman in the family to lean on. Her friend canceling coffee again assures her something is wrong between them. She feels slighted and unappreciated, an unimportant person. Lastly, her mentor condemns her actions harshly in a public forum of her peers, making her want to disappear forever from this group she clearly does not belong in.

It is painful to have one of these things happen once in a while- normally she would shake it off with prayer and bounce back, able to make better choices and lean in a little closer to Jesus. But lately they have bombarded her one right after the other, and in her quiet suffering she cries the lonely tears.

When she feels as if she is not enough, she feels alone. When she reaches out while feeling alone, she pulls back, out of fear of all those things she has been fighting. What she really needs is you.

She needs you to tell her she is enough. She needs to feel her worth rise a bit. She needs to be reminded Jesus stands in the gap for her, no matter who broadens the crack. She is looking for a phone call, a moment of your time, an apology. She may not ever ask for any of these things, yet she longs for them.

Feeling like she is not enough takes a toll on her heart. She wonders if she will ever stop second guessing herself and looking over her shoulder. Maybe she even thinks relationships cannot be salvaged, lost time not made up for. If no one ever comes to her to encourage her or make things right, it doesn’t matter. Jesus stands in the gap. And he is all she will ever need.