Journal Entry:

I can write about being weary. I am exhausted. Life has become complicated again. I have more obligations than I know what to do with and the responsibilities are overwhelming. My mom needs more than I can provide for her. I am doing my very best, but it is difficult to fulfill every need. My dad is not replaceable, and I need to figure out my limits so she isn’t disappointed.

I have another empty bedroom to clean. I am trying not to cuss and hold it together (mostly). I have filled more trash bags than I thought I would. I had to vacuum and sweep- twice. I’m not sure when this room was last cleaned. Maybe when my daughter moved out- four years ago? Why are boys so gross? (sorry kiddo)

This sounds so trivial. I know there are real-world problems. This extra bedroom, my mom’s needs, a painting project and the cats who have been dumped here. Do people see a barn and think irrationally “there’s a farm, they want our extra cats”? More mouths to feed and more to clean up after.

I’ve been emotional over my son leaving the nest. I was finishing his laundry and taping boxes. I helped haul his stuff up the stairs to a third story apartment. (Note to anyone young enough to consider an apt. If you want none of your parents to visit, get one on the third floor. For real, I am not getting any younger.)

I got up at six am on a Saturday to scrub the kitchen, then I spent the morning outside landscaping and raking and planting. By the time the rain came, I was beat. Don’t worry- momma got a nap, cause she’s tired but not crazy.

I know about self-care. I also know about coffee, meditation, scripture reading and white space. I am not sure if this is the exact kind of “weary” Jesus is offering rest from, but I feel it’s applicable.

Sometimes I get so caught up, and I feel overwhelmed.

The truth is my time is within my control.

My time and obligations are both things I need to know how to manage. There are simple ways to overcome feeling so out of breath. Here are some real-world things I do when I start feeling overwhelmed.

The first thing to do- assess your time.

If you haven’t ever used a daily or weekly time journal, now is a good time to start. First, find a good one online to print. You will want one which reflects your normal day. If you get up at 5, your journal entries start at 5. Every fifteen minutes, record your obligations in pencil. You can get a nice one here. 

The second thing- look for overlaps.

These are commitments you have made (or have been made for you) which overlap one another in the time-space continuum. Do not be afraid to prioritize them and completely ax one or two. AHEM. You cannot be in two places at once. This includes kids sports agendas and church commitments.

The third thing to do- highlight the things you cannot control.

Drop offs and pickups of your children, an inflexible work schedule, and leadership meetings each week at the church are probably out of your control. Your grocery shopping, coffee meetups and television time can be rearranged. The choices we make with our time will determine some of our relationships. There is no grace where grace is not allowed. Allow yourself and those who love you a bit of grace. Learn to say no.

Finally- create or find the white space.

If there is none, create some. Your family deserves it, and your time with Jesus needs it. Get yourself a planner like this one. This planner comes out twice a year and has a space for all the important things in my life. You don’t have to get this specific one, but get one and live by it. (plus side to this one- supporting a small business)

Saying no to obligations is not hard. It is necessary. Not everyone understands it, and the good thing is- they don’t have to.

Join me next time for “No Isn’t A Four Letter Word”