As you all probably know, my husband had a unique answer to my last question concerning advice to newlywed couples. After some thought, I decided this information can be applied to any marriage, new or progressed. Knowing basic things can help in sticky situations in any relationship. There are some things we just need to know. There are some things we need to learn and some we need to accept.

Know when to Fold ‘Em

Even though I am slightly convinced he was referring to laundry, I love the idea of this topic. Maybe knowing when to fold laundry is a key to success in your marriage right now. I wouldn’t know- no one here ever folds anything until it is piled up so high you cannot even see the basket underneath. Or it’s on our bed, which we have to clean off for sleeping each night. My hubs is an awesome laundry man- he folds, as well as washes, dries and puts away.  He is not the same type of procrastinator as I am, and I couldn’t be more thankful for that trait in him.

Knowing when to fold em is tricky business in the marital world of wonder. When do you fight for what you believe, continue to prove a point, or have to be “right” ?  At what point do you allow grace and mercy and just stop with all the arguing, uncomfortable conversation and cloud hanging over your marriage?  For us, it depends on the topic. Sometimes we “fight” over minor things- baseball, football, television and the fact that one of us doesn’t read all that much. **Ahem**

Mostly though, the ONLY things we hang onto when in disagreement are when they involve choices we have made that directly affects the other in a negative way. Let me repeat- if it doesn’t affect your spouse or yourself negatively, if it isn’t hurtful or compromise your relationship to a point of no return, it’s probably not worth fighting over- much less losing sleep and a guest bedroom visit. There just isn’t enough time to spend or breathe to waste hanging on to past events, miscommunications or unreasonable expectation. Both of us are human. We both screw up plenty on our own, put us together and we are capable of screwing up a lot more.

We must be able to look past the little annoying things we do to one another and just fold. Cave. Give in to the love, passion and truth that our marriage is based on. We have a God based marriage…God first, spouse second, everyone and thing after that. This includes our parents, families, children. Once that houseful of kids has grown up and gone, it will be just as it was when we started- just us and Him. We must give ourselves enough rope to tie up those loose ends and set them free. Fold em all, and enjoy the next stages of life together.

 

Join me the next installment “Know when to Walk Away”