Marriage and Truth

Here is the truth about marriage.

You are either committed, or you are not. There is no middle of the road.

Marriage is a relationship which requires consistent maintenance and work.

There will be disagreements. There may be hardships. There will be people trying to get in your way. There will be financial decisions, kid decisions, and job decisions.

But there are also wonderful moments of connection. There is common ground. There are children, homes, and families, all parts of your marriage commitment. There is time spent with intention and purpose for one another. There is a part of marriage which is very much like a fairytale, in tiny increments.

 You have to work and sometimes fight for those moments. You have to look for them.

In marriage, you both have to be willing to dig deep down into yourself, pull out the ugliest things, and work through them together. Sometimes those things are big.

Are you invested in your marriage?

Are you willing to do the things you expect your spouse to do?

Do you know your spouse is a gift?

 In The Garden, God made man a wife, and he said “It is good.” He was well pleased with giving him a spouse, a helper, a lover, and a friend. God sanctioned the first marriage, and even when they were tossed out of The Garden, he placed them together to work the soil and bear children and struggle.

They built a home- together. They handled grief- together. They worked the land, raised livestock, had children, and overcame obstacles together.

Adam and Eve did not set the marriage precedent by giving up. They did not leave for something easier. They did not expect things of one another they could not expect from themselves.

Friend- if you are in a marriage and it is not working, ask yourself why. Maybe there IS something others don’t know. I am not condemning anyone for those hard choices. But as a woman, I know how easy it is to quit the fight because I’m tired. My husband doesn’t fight the same way I do. I know how simple it seems to walk away because it feels “complicated “or “unfulfilling.”  I know how much work marriage is. I have walked the walk for over 27 years.

 I have also watched dear friends fight and scrape and almost give up. Through God’s providence and their commitment, they salvaged their marriage and rebuilt it into something beautiful. It was prayer-earned and hard fought. They were both ready to admit defeat, and somehow, the scale was tipped in their favor, in favor of their marriage.

When we overcome the things Satan throws at us on the daily, we win each time. He cringes. Heaven celebrates. Jesus smiles and God says “It is good.”

What can you do to fight for your marriage today?

XOXO,

I know these are strong words, but they have been on my heart lately and I have felt prompted to share them. I am not at all advocating divorce. I am also not advocating for people to stay in a marriage with an abuser.  I am not a counselor. I have been married to my husband for 27+ years.