The Inside Jokes of Our Marriage

The funniest things happen on a daily basis in our marriage. There is always something which occurs that makes us laugh together. Most of those things we could never share with any other person. Some of them are super personal things, maybe even intimate in nature. Some are just downright inappropriate hilarity, not optional for table conversation.  A few are just things we keep to ourselves because we treasure the private moments we have together as a couple.

I know what you are thinking, just look at those two. They have a perfect marriage, with no problems no issues and no reasons to be unhappy with one another. I am here to set the record straight. I hate it when people say this type of thing to or about us. When I say my hubs and I have a great marriage, that is just what I mean. I never say perfect, free from issues or always happily ever after. I never say anything about our marriage is the best case scenario for anyone else who is married. I can only say it works for us, and it starts with Jesus, followed by respect, love, and some serious privacy.

Let’s talk about privacy for a minute. Having a private life is a disappearing art. There aren’t a lot of private areas in our lives. Between social media and the lack of self-control that some people have, little is left to the imagination when it comes to the private lives of some. It makes me wonder how many people who are dating pass up a longer term relationship based on having too much information about the other person, too quickly. In our marriage, we do not share everything with everyone we know. We do not confide in anyone else the way we confide in one another. Our personal lives are not published on social media sites. There is a lot more to us than any of you will ever know. This is how privacy works.

Privacy equals self-preservation. I have seen good relationships fail due to lack of privacy.  Hubs and I have mutual respect and love for one another. We like to have secrets from the rest of the world. We still do not know everything there is to know about one another, even after 25 years! We have no intentional secrets from one another, and we do not run when the other goes through some sort of change.  Part of our marriage is the evolution of us both as individuals and as a couple. We need to be intentional about our commitment to our marriage, and intentional about our unconditional love for one another.

Being intentional is something we all talk about, but rarely give much effort to. When I am in a crazy place, and things are happening around me which I cannot control, my husband intentionally loves me harder and makes sure I know it. When his proverbial plate is full and he is at his wits end with something, I love him a little harder. My unconditional love is something he needs to be able to depend on, and sometimes even when we disagree, we have to intentionally ramp it up a bit. Our job isn’t to be fifty – fifty in our marriage- our job is to always be one hundred percent to one hundred percent. This way we are always running full steam ahead, never looking back and never underestimating the things life throws at us.

We knew from the first week in our first apartment, this was going to be the hardest and most amazing thing we were ever involved in. We made a commitment in front of God, family and friends to be each other’s forever, till death do us part. Our commitment goes from this world right into eternity, because Christ allows us that luxury. So we keep our inside jokes inside, and we laugh at all the things we could or would never share with others. We give each other a knowing glance now and then, and we laugh most of the time we are together. We bring our one hundred percent to the table every single moment, and we wouldn’t want it any other way.