The Raising of the Boys

These boys are disgusting, and I am their mother.

Holy Smokes

One time when the kids were small, I had someone tell me to pay special attention to the work it took raising a girl because, after all, girls are much harder to raise than boys.

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She lied. Right to my face. The easiest kid we have raised is our daughter. For real. And when she got married she left me here with all these boys. And I am having a really hard time with all of that. Boys are gross. They dirty more dishes than an entire house full of company. They break things and never tell you. They are capable of producing smells and not even saying excuse me. They leave their Legos and hot wheels around for you to step on. When they get older, they buy enough cars to make your home look like a glorified junkyard. There are car parts EVERYWHERE. And the tools. If I step on one more tool I cannot pronounce- really. So many trips to the auto parts store that I lost count, but they know our boys’ names there. We have family who cannot remember  their names. But at the auto parts store, they know their names and their cars complete with make, model, and VIN.

I just can’t tell you how hard it is to keep up.

They are simple creatures, really. Except for- they are not. They require little in fashion- jeans and t-shirts. They require simple in food- meat, junk, and drinks. They require very little room maintenance- no repainting or decorating for them.  They don’t require much in conversation either. But for all the things they don’t require, teaching them how to be men is a big, rough job. The amount of emotion that flows through them is unreal.

Their daddy is an amazing, upstanding man. He loves me fiercely and with every fiber of his being. He is respectful, gracious and kind. He understands that some things devalue women, so he does not participate in them. He is always looking out for the girls in this family- all of them. He loves Jesus.

Teaching these boys to be like him is hard because no one wants to be like their dad at this age. Even if he is a great example of how to just be. They would rather find their own way, turning my hair gray and making my anxiety swell to all-time high levels. My blood pressure goes up just writing this. These boys are strong, and they are not intimidated by much. They don’t back down from challenges and that includes when they don’t want to do their chores. They have strong opinions and even stronger jawbones. They are the size of men no, and are making their way into this world one at a time.

No, raising boys has not been the hardest thing for us after all. Turning them out into the world to see how they do- now that is the hard part. Will they flourish or fail? Will they stay the course, or come back home, defeated and licking their wounds for another try? Will they even leave?  I often wonder how it is great men have great sons. I guess it’s time for us to find out how great they can be, on their own two feet. Each has a path to follow- now we wait and watch and see how far they get.

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